If a minority of women were blessed by the grace of natural femininity at birth, the rest of us can get over it by knowing that femininity can be apprehended and developed with a little bit of work and attention. Femininity does not come in the shape of a uniform you can easily slip in. It is not a mere question of appearance or fashion…in much the same way as a pair of Jimmy shoo cannot be compared to the glass slipper that transforms Cinderella into a Princess. Wearing the latest pair of Louboutin shoes and putting Guerlain lipstick will not transmute us into a benchmark model of femininity.
There is no single model or ideal mold for femininity. However, each one of us holds a unique essence of femininity that belongs to no one else but ourselves and which very often lies buried within. We must therefore look for it, find its singular characteristics, and domesticate them to reveal what they represent in the way we will choose. To cherish, love and tame one’s femininity means being in total control of your true self, of your sensuality and sexuality, and of the true essence that makes each one of us a woman in its own right.
As I was writing the book ‘Une mère en talons aiguilles’ ( A Mother in High Heels) which came out in February 2011, yearning to share with other women the recognition of our true feminine nature is what actually inspired me and prompted me to complete my piece of work. Since then, I have received an impressive number of testimonials from women of all walks of life who confessed that the words and feelings I had put on paper helped them realize their inner feminine potential and asked me that I continue to sustain them in their self-fulfillment.
I decided to create the program The Art of Wearing High Heels™ as a way to provide women with a tool to reconnect and reconcile them with their femininity through an iconic object: high-heeled shoes.
Why shoes you may ask? Because women have a profound, passionate and intimate rapport with shoes and with high heels in particular. When I ask women why such a craze for high heels, the vast majority of them answer that they just cannot resist the attraction for the inexplicable and invasive boost given to their femininity the moment they slip into a pair. Ironically, the intensity of this emotion is what will bring about the desire or the fear to wear them. The intuition of possibly being overtaken by the object itself inhibits very often those who would like to wear them. ‘Am I able to convey in a clear and faithful way the message I wish to send, or on the contrary, ‘Am I being ruled by what they have brought about and given birth to? Thus the object can be tamed or conversely can dictate what it creates.
Do we succeed in making it ours or not? Just as a fiery thoroughbred stallion that we wish to train, high heeled shoes must be tamed. It is my belief that this disturbing duality lives in the heart of many women: Therefore it is not surprising to note that a great number of women purchase high heeled shoes without ever wearing them……Even worse, how many pairs will never leave the closet!
The art of wearing high heels goes beyond the mere process of learning how to walk in high heels. It is a philosophy. It is an art of being. An art of awakening the true woman who lies dormant within. By learning to understand and cherish our body, by acknowledging our strengths and weaknesses, we set off a process to develop and reinforce our self-esteem. By working on our deportment and by striving to find the right posture, we integrate fluidity and nimbleness into our movements which in turn will bring about grace and harmony in our body language: a genuine form of elegance, our own form of elegance will emerge as a result. By reinforcing our self confidence through our new born elegance, we will start freeing ourselves from stereotypes, clichés and other patterns and molds that hamper the expression of our own femininity.
High heels are both an ideal pretext and an exceptional tool to take up with our femininity again.
Together we will develop the capacities we need to discover our true feminine essence. By defining our feminine individuality with its unique peculiarities we will naturally mark ourselves out from other women. There are no possible comparisons because there is no other woman like you. To be unique is precious. So to all the women who are reading these lines, because you are unique and so precious, you should already feel marvelous. And I make it my mission statement to have you realize it.